Chapter 4 Enslaving America

“I have always had something wrong with me”

October 20, 2013

One of the most disturbing comments I have ever heard came recently when a young man shared his feeling that, “I have always had something wrong with me”. Going through life feeling and believing that you weren’t made right; therefore, by extension you would never be able to function in the world in which we live is a terrible sentence to endure. I assured this young man that he was born with all the necessary mental, physical, and spiritual components to complete his mission on earth and return to a loving heavenly Father in due time. He is not alone in feeling incapable of finding joy and purpose in life. US prisons hold over one percent of the United States population at any given time. Most are in prison because they have directly or indirectly entered this world of declared dysfunction.

The pattern is simple and uniform. Something in their life forces one to the conclusion that he or she is not as good as others. Many times early in life adoption, abandonment, divorce, death of a loved one, illegal activity by parents, illegal drugs, ill advised use of legal drugs, physical imperfections, mental deficiencies, learning pattern differences, and other life experiences give one the impression that, somehow, they are at fault. That, indeed, “something has always been wrong with me.”

These thinking patterns create low self esteem, self doubt, and serious negative reactions to authority. Many begin to strike out at those who love them thinking that their best strategic plan for survival is to strike against those that love them before they get “booted” from the family or other relationship. Strong, firm, loving care will eventually calm the understanding and bless the lives of those caught up in this self-imposed imprisonment. For those who fall through the cracks and become wards of the state, incarcerated, set in probation, and forever lost in the bowels of a system that has no answers, the idea of insanity isn’t bad. At least it provides some answers to why individuals have problems.

I believe there is a bright side to the turmoil created in the hearts of those who live with these difficulties. For those who don’t believe in eternity and a loving Heavenly Father, you will have to find your strength in the inner peace of your mind by understanding your personal capabilities and desires. For example, you will find a pattern of success throughout the ages that has certain tenants which allow people to move though life’s experiences with positive strides. Use them as a pattern for your success. Personally, I have a complete and abiding faith in God and understand where these tenants come from. They are eternal principles that provide direction, hope, and understanding.

 Few, if any of us as mortals have not had serious self doubt at some time in our lives. None of us is perfect. Paul in the New Testament, specifically in Romans, shares the wonderful blessings that can and will come to each of us through the atonement, and through the Grace of God. For my wonderful friend with the notion that he something has always been wrong with him, take one step at a time. We joked a few days ago about an old movie, “What about Dave” and the concept of baby steps; very dippy movie with a profoundly positive bit of advice. For those of us who are in the bi-polar range of insanity, don’t try to jump over too many building at a single bound; take one stair at a time and make sure every step is well placed. Remember! Your loved ones are with you. Those who have abandoned you through divorce, or death, have moved on to other pastures. Your venture now is to direct your life toward new Vegas where life will begin to blossom for you. Your child will know you in the future as the wise and honorable father that shared his love for you with his mother and his Heavenly Father. You will thrive in your new under experiences and find peace in the things you do.

God bless each of us as we work through our temporal and spiritual experiences and find the true meaning of eternal life.

Duane Jacobs, grandfather, father, brother, uncle, cousin, and friend