Common errors and Crazy people

October 21, 2012

I have been taking a “crazy” pill twice a day for several years. Petie, our family physician said it would help solve my body melt problems. I told him I didn’t like taking anything into my body that I didn’t need, or would cause harm. He clarified that it was a depressant pill. It has probably not caused any harm other than addicting me to the blasted thing, but it has given me license to talk as an expert on being depressed, or “crazy”. I used this word advisedly because it has very heavy connotations. Over the past twenty years, most of my family has brought up the “depressed” word. As you know there are many different definitions for depressed and for crazy. I prefer the one that covers both most clearly.

Simply stated these terms describe each of us on any given day when we do, say, or react to things outside the normal expectancy of our given society. For example, I was attending an all male church meeting one day when an individual and his visiting son began sharing things that were borderline mockery of some of the tenants I hold dear. “Normal” people just sit patiently and call the perpetrators crazy later. Crazy people like me, stand and tell them that their comments did not go unnoticed, and were unappreciated and highly offensive to at least one in the group.

Another example sharing my crazy side with the education community was while I was a faculty senator at Salt Lake Community College. We were being briefed on the up-coming year’s budget. We had received the budget previous to the meeting so we would be conversant and ready to acknowledge the greatness and superior planning necessary to promote and ask for approval of such a noble document. I was given the opportunity to speak and noted that only twenty percent of the proposed budget went for “classroom instruction” I was almost shouted down by President B. stating I was incorrect. As we looked at the numbers facing us, the group became very quiet as the numbers $100,000,000, or there about as the total budget request, and the number 19,000,000 and some change came up as the allotted budget amount for classroom instruction. Obviously, we went on and gave our rubber stamp to the budget, which went on to the various boards and finally the state legislature, which signed on without additional comment regarding my original crazy notion.

Recently I shared a notion with my siblings dealing with a parcel of land we inherited from Grandmother Lucy, our wonderful mom. We have had only one looker since mother graduated this life. He is a fine gentleman and has leased the property for many years. He and I discussed his interest in purchasing the land and I went so far as to suggest a price which was still too heavy a burden for him to take on. So, on to my crazy notion; I shared the idea that two of us, my brother and I hold our property and offer to sell our sisters property to the person doing the farming. He shared with me a cryptic definition of crazy when he noted a statement given by our Aunt Marian after her husband, Chris, had suggested something that would require some cash; which they never, ever had. My sisters simply did not respond.

Jean and I visited my sister this week and went to lunch. She has gone through another cycle of merciless flagellation. She told me that she has great plans for the future. Many of the things she discussed were ideas she and I had made very sincere and dedicated plans to implement in lifetime past. I told her she was manic, depressed, crazy, to which she replied that she must have dreams, because when dreams die there lies the end of the trail. Can she do these things? Should she do these things? Again, her personal agency will make that determination.

On the flip side of this, I have had some marvelous conversations with my nephew, Ford. He and I couldn’t be on more opposite sides of the issue of spirituality. He has declared himself an atheist, noting that everything he learned in his childhood was a lie; while I maintain my absolute and 100 percent declaration that God the eternal Father, his Son, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Ghost live and are an integral part of our life. See, we can disagree. We can still love each other as family and enjoy the many things we have in common. We can and do have some excellent conversations about the tremendous difficulties this country is entertaining. We can find great joy in seeing each other find enjoyment in producing income, in past war stories about our military experiences, and we can continue to poke at each other’s spiritual balm.

We each have our agency. We got that from God; In Ford’s case, from the great time machine in the sky. I believe we each have an obligation do the best we know how to do and to follow the promptings we receive through the Holy Ghost. I believe that we are continually guided by ministering angels who are entrusted with our care and encouragement.

Who is making errors? Who is spiritually guided? Who will find peace and satisfaction? Who is crazy?

God bless each of you as you move through life’s path. Hold that iron rod (the word of God) and go forward with boldness and determination.

Duane Jacobs, Grandfather, brother, uncle, cousin, and fond friend